Posted on 18 July 2017
We are well into the holiday time of year when many of us are going away and I am seeing many clients who find this a difficult period.
One client, who has always dreaded holidays, told me when she first came to see me: ‘I live in Islington, and coming to your anxiety hypnotherapy clinic in Harley Street is as far as I like to go. And I feel terrible about it. All my family is so excited, they have been looking forward to the holiday for ages. I am smiling but behind the smile I just wish I could stay at home.’
She was surprised when I told her this feeling wasn’t unusual. We all find it difficult sometimes to admit to not liking something which everyone tells us we should like, so people who dread holidays tend to keep quiet about it.
But this anxiety around going on holiday is common and I think this for the following reasons:
To some extent we are all hardwired to be wary of change. This is an evolutionary mechanism to keep us safe. If we are in a good balanced state this fear is a healthy safety mechanism making us prepare and take care when we do something new. But if you are anxious it can get out of control and you are just fearful.
Often holidays start with a packing and a flight. Crowded airports, pushing, security queues. There is so much going on that, for some people, that can feel completely overwhelming.
See flights above. Then, once you have arrived, the everyday things which you choose at home, from the food you eat to the bed you sleep in, are not in your hands any more. This can feel uncomfortable for some people.
If you suffer from anxiety then you may have ways you manage and control your anxiety. Some of these may even be unconscious or so much part of your everyday life that you don’t really think about them. If you are away you may forget these routines and suffer for it.
Often these negative feelings and emotions reflect deeply held beliefs and ways of seeing the world. If you have a negative view of the world, then the idea of doing something you have never done before, or even something which is not routine can be terrifying – you believe that whatever new is going to happen will be bad. Using my range of cognitive hypnotherapy techniques, I can help you clear whatever it is which is causing that belief and replace it with something more useful to you.
With a changed mindset, you can look forward to really enjoying a holiday. And you will feel more confident to say what you want to do with your well-earned time off.
You do not have to like certain things just because other people tell you to. If you feel happier walking in Scotland than on the beaches at St Tropez say so. You may have to negotiate with your partner about where to go and what you want. But you might be surprised at how much better you feel even if you are going somewhere which is not your ideal. If you are prepared, if it is your choice to compromise then you will feel in control and your anxiety will lessen.
Wherever you are going this year, think about coming to see me at my hypnosis for anxiety clinics in Henley on Thames or Harley Street so you can fly away with a clear and happy outlook
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